Episode 4 in the Blanche White Series

     Blanche is a middle-aged, black woman with strong opinions, a generous heart and a drive to find the truth. She reveals to us the pain and fear of living black in America. Barbara Neely has created an intelligent, complex main character in this series, and interesting secondary characters to populate her world.
     In Blanche Passes Go, issues of abuse, white supremacy, and class stereotypes are explored and turned on their ear. Blanche returns to her hometown of Farleigh, NC for the summer. She comes to help her best friend, Adele, with her new catering business, and, to feel out the possibility of returning to Farleigh permanently after her children go off to college. She doesn't expect to be confronting the fear and pain of a rape she experienced 10 years earlier, let alone the gold-digging fiance' of a former client, a murder, the neighbor children escaping the abuse of the father toward their mother, and the possibility of romance.
     I love this series, and I cheer for Blanche as she walks through the pain of her past in order to set herself free, and works tirelessly to bring justice for her former client and appropriate karma to her former rapist. I am saddened that most of the whites in Blanche's world are bigoted, self-serving scum. Blanche would never give me a second look as a possible friend, and, that saddens me. But having lived in an integrated neighborhood in Philadelphia for 18 years, I also understand the deep pain and injustice that leads minorities to protect themselves from constant abuse.
    While the Blanche White series is certainly in the "mystery" category, it is so much more. It is literature that explores the deep issues and experiences of blacks in America, of women in male dominates society, and in dignity and respect for poor, hard-working people. Each book can stand alone, but there is a richness in reading the books in order as Blanche grows and develops as a person. I give this book 5 stars. If you are a sensitive person, keep the Kleenex nearby.

The Truth According to Us

     Macedonia, WV is a small town running on history and a shakey hold on the present. Layla Beck is a priveleged young woman, sent to Macedonia throught the Works Progress artists' writing project, exiled by her Senator father in order to grow up and get in touch with real life.
     Miss Beck is assigned to live with the Romeyn family, once the leaders of Macedonia, but now languishing on the outer edges of society. Felix is the shady son of the former president of the local mill. He has two daughter's, Willa, 11, and Bird, about 8 years old, cared for by his sister, Jollie, a 30-something spinster. There are also twin sisters, Mae and Minerva, who live in the family home.
     Layla interviews town's people in order to write the Sesquesentenial History of Macedonia, she begins to understand there are deeply hidden secrets that few people want uncovered, an agreed upon understanding of the past that doesn't line up with the facts, and a mystery surrounding the fire at the mill that killed Felix's best friend and Jollie's love, and caused the downfall of their father from being the president of the mill.
     Willa is determined to "assist" Layla in order to learn more of the roles of her father and aunt in Macedonia, to understand why her father comes and goes secretly, why Jollie has never married, and, to keep Layla from falling in love with her father and stealing even more of his time away from her.
     The story is complicated with many twists and turns that kept me engaged throughout the book. The device of interspeecing letters with narative did not always work and slowed the forward movement too often, especially in the first have of the book. But it was definitely worth persevering through those spots to glean the richness of the characters.
     I give this a 4 star rating, and highly recomend it for those who like historic fiction, family sagas, and explorations of "history" and "perception".

The Work by Wes Moore

The Work by Wes Moore

I am not a big fan of reading non-fiction as leisure reading. But I chose to read and review this book because the premise of finding meaning in life through service is near and dear to my heart.
Wes Moore is an intelligent, gifted person and an inspiring writer. The Job traces his rise from a turbulent childhood in the Bronx and Baltimore, through his service in Afghanistan, his work in the White House and as a banker on Wall Street. In each setting, he gathered the wisdom and foolishness of each setting as he kept asking what he needed to be happy and content in life.
Mr Moore interweaves stories of heroes and everyday people he has met and from whom he has learned during his journey. Mr Moore's strength and openness shines through and I felt uplifted by the many stories woven through the book. This is a feel-good inspiration to find a meaningful life. I highly recommend, and, hope that Wes Moore keeps writing and inspiring others.

The Blanche White Series: Two Books (and counting) of Excellent Intrigue

 Blanche on the Lamb is the beginning of a sassy new series. Blanche White is an intelligent, middle-aged, African-American domestic worker in North Carolina. She is The Help in current time, with attitude. In this book, one of her employers stiffs her with a bad check which cause her checks to bounce, so she lays low by working for a rich family at their country estate. The only member of the family who seems humane and caring is the family's slightly mentally challenged Cousin Mumford. None of the others are worth the air they breathe.  The murder and subsequent antics of the family seem silly and at times comedic, against Blanche's commentary on race relations in Southern America. If you enjoy southern Gothic with attitude, you will love Blanche.


 Blanche Among the Talented Tenth tackles the ugly truth of discrimination among people of color. Her children are attending an elite private school in Boston, and are beginning to bring home uppity attitudes that Blanche does not like one bit. when the kids are invited to an exclusive Maine resort for wealthy blacks, Blanche decides to allow this romp through exclusive, black America. When one guest commits suicide, and another death leads to complicated questions, Blanche is dragged into finding the truth. This idyllic resort is littered with deceit, snobbery and generations of history, along with a bit of romance.
     Blanche is her usual sassy self, with wit and insight that uncovers secrets and a long history of racial discrimination. I cheer for Blanche once again, and for her integrity and her courage to face heart-wrenching decisions. I can't wait until the next volume is published!

Vanessa and Her Sister

 The story of Vanessa Stephen Bell and her sister Virginia Stephen Woolf is a story of love and madness, talent and privilege, young people breaking convention and plagued by guilt. The story is told through journal entries, and postcards and letters. 
     The novel is compelling and kept drawing me in, even though I don't like the format of journal entries, etc. If you are a fan of Vanessa's art and Virginia's writing, this is an intriguing look at their very private lives. I disliked Virginia and felt she was a spoiled, manipulative brat. But my view is from the 21st Century where mental health support is much more enlightened and treatment more successful than ever imagined in 1905.
     The lives of Vanessa and Virginia are intertwined with their brothers and friends who loosely form a bohemian and intellectual group that meet regularly to discuss the art scene in London and Paris. All these young people go on to fame as their careers mature.
     This novel is an intriguing look at 1905 privilege and creative young talent. If you enjoy art, writing and historical insights, you will enjoy Vanessa and Her Sister.

I Am Sophie Tucker

     I received an advanced copy of this novel through NetGalley, in exchange for a review. This is my personal opinion.

     Susan & Lloyd Ecker have created an interesting, lush story of the life and times of Sophie Tucker. She is an icon of Vaudeville entertainment and the proverbial rags to riches story. She came to America as a young child, and her parents worked night and day to provide for her and her siblings. My favorite part of the story was her tour of Europe with her third husband, Al Lackey. She retraced the journey her parents took from the Ukraine to Connecticut, and I felt it was the most authentic she ever allowed herself to be publicly.

     I have very mixed feeling about the book. It was always interesting and compelling and very well written. I have used several of Ms. Tucker's songs in my work as a music therapist with geriatric clients. So I had a vague sense of Sophie, but I really didn't like her when I got to know her better through this book. I found her to be so rude, pushy, abusive and crude. She is not someone I would ever waste time getting to know.  But it was fun and interesting reading about her. I love the history of vaudeville, and enjoyed the inside look provided through Sophie's eyes.

     I am curious about the revelations at the end of the book. I don't want to share them and ruin it for others, but I am very curious about how true they are. They do shed a kinder and more ruthless light on Sophie.

     If you love showbiz stories, you will love this book. 

A Matter of Mercy by Lynne Hugo

I received a free copy of this book by NetGalley in exchange for writing a public review. This is my personal and truthful opinion of this book.




This is a mystery that takes place on Cape Cod and focuses on the aquaculturists that "farm" the shallows for shellfish. As a big fan of Philip R Craig's Vineyard Mystery Series, I decided to give this a try.

Mercy explores the lives of two people who grew up on the island, their intertwined stories as a storm throws them together with long-term consequences.

Caroline Marcum has returned to the island to care for her dying mother. Ridley Neal is a former high school acquaintance who works a grant that is in front of Caroline's home. A wealthy "weekender" has filed a lawsuit against Rid and two of his fellow aquaculturists for use of their grants, claiming he owns the land and they interfere with his view.

Land rights, traditional vrs progressive land rights, death and dying,  shell fishing, and love all play a part in this touching and at times scary story of life and love on Cape Cod. The fact that it is based on a true story, make it all the more compelling.

A well-written novel that digs deep into your emotions and the circumstances of life fore Caroline and Rid. I highly recommend this book.

The Summer Wind: A great read for the last days of summer

I received this book as an advance copy from NetGalley in exchange for agreeing to write a review. This is my true and honest opinion.

The Summer Wind (A Lowcountry Summer, Book 2)

By Mary Alice Monroe

I did not read Book 1 in this series, and while I am sure it would have added greater understanding if I had, I enjoyed this as a stand alone book.

This is a story of the family matriarch, steeped in Southern history and tradition, her life-long servant turned personal friend, and the matriarch's three granddaughters. Mamaw has brought the three half-sisters together to help them renew their childhood friendship. Mamaw is planning to sell the family home, but wants this one last chance to strengthen the bonds of these young women. 

Dora has fled a crumbling marriage with her young son, diagnosed with autism. Carson has returned from Florida in order to sort through her life and make decisions about her future. Harper has returned from New York, trying to decide if high-flying corporate life is what she want for her life.

During all this inner searching, there are new and renewed friendships to consider, Lucille has a health scare, Marietta (Mamaw) is reminiscing over the years spent on Sullivan's Island and hoping her plan to draw the three sisters together doesn't backfire.

This is a very enjoyable summer read, fairly light and easy, but with some interesting elements on what abuse is, how to interact with special needs children, out-of-wedlock pregnancy, and race relations on a small southern island.

I highly recommend this and will definitely be reading Book 3 when it is published. I give this 4 stars out of 5.

They Are Not Me

We Are Not Ourselves is a first novel by Matthew Thomas. I have such mixed feeling about it that I give it 3 stars. It deserves 5 stars for being well written, unrelenting and strong. For me personally, I would give it 1 or 2 stars for being slow moving and incredibly depressing. This book is the story of Eileen Leary who grew up in Queens NY to immigrant Irish parents. She is left yo raise herself due to alcoholic parents who are so depressed themselves that they have little time or attention left for Eileen. So she weaves dreams of living a better life. To her this means living in a better neighborhood, having an ambitious, upwardly mobile husband, and the perfect home.Of course, real life does not unfold kindly for Eileen. The book progresses painstakingly slowly through the rest of her life as she continues to strive for her dream at all costs, and her struggle to reconcile reality.The plot moves so slowly, it reminds me of literature from a long-ago era. At times it felt as though I was watching paint dry. But the characters were so clearly portrayed that I continued because I kept hoping they would find a way to bring hope, peace and happiness to their lives.It is a vividly conceive saga of the life of many people in the Boomer generation. It also made me so grateful that I was raised and chose to live with a heart for others and not just be consumed by my own existance.

Unrelenting Sadness and Deprivation

Angela's Ashes by Frank McCourt is a memoir of Frank's childhood in NYC and Limerick, Ireland. It is very well written, drawing you into his life in vivid detail. It was as if I was watching a movie, not reading, seeing each setting, each person in amazing detail. It makes me want to read about what happened in his life when he returned to America as a young man.
     McCourt's story is an almost stereotypical description of the Irish drunk father, the long-suffering mother, one child born after another, with survival being a miracle, an exception to the rule. The horrible living conditions, the relentless hunger, the eventual turn to stealing for survival all contribute to a picture of a life of barely surviving. In these conditions, Frank attended school, contended with bullying, with mean-spirited adults in his life who unrelentingly told him in every way that he was no good, not worth keeping alive, a sinner doomed to hell. The few adults who were kind or encouraging shone like a beacon in the never-ending grayness of his existence.
     It is a miracle that Frank survived. I am so curious how he became a writer. Was there further education? What work did he initially find when he returned to America. My next book is Tis by Frank McCourt, the story of his early years in America.

A family saga of wine and whinning

I receive advance copies of books through NetGalley in order to write and share reviews of the books. I am not paid other than to receive the books, and I have no association with either the authors or the publishers.

A Bordeaux Dynasty: A Novel

Françoise Bourdin (Author)

This is a novel of a family dynasty of wine makers. As the novel begins, the family is gathering for the summer, to culminate in the harvest. Aurelien, the patriarch, runs the vineyard with an iron fist. He has little patience for anything else in his life. He has 4 grown sons. Louise-Marie, has become a journalist and is beginning to write his first novel. He is married to Pauline, and they have a young daughter. They live in Paris. Robert is a surgeon and the medical director of a large hospital in Paris. He is single, but hopelessly in love with Pauline whom he was dating prior to her marriage to Louis-Marie. Alexander lives at the vineyard, Fonteyne, in an estate cottage, with his wife, Dominique, and their twin sons. Aurelien's youngest son, Jules, was adopted at a young age under mysterious circumstances. Jules has charm, good looks, and a drive to make Fonteyne continue it's proud history of wine-making. He is Aurelien's right-hand man, and is gradually taking over more and more of the operation of Fonteyne.
And thus the machinations of a major dysfunctional family begins. The novel takes place in recent time, but the exact time-period is never stated. The beauty of the region, and especially Fonteyne, is elegantly described. The characters are well-defined. The story is well-written.
BUT, I did not enjoy this novel. Most of the characters were deeply narcissistic and hurt each other at every turn. Father and three of the sons were horrible womanizers, never caring for the feelings or well-being of the many women they bed. And there was no responsibility toward spreading disease or creating children. I simply did not like the characters. I would not socialize with anyone who behaved this way, and, felt that all the various calamities that occurred were just consequences for their irresponsible behavior. I would not have finished reading the book if I had not made a commitment to review it.
I recognize that I have a specific perspective about people, and that others with a different moral compass may very well enjoy this story. But from my perspective, I give this novel 3 stars.

Spirituality

Spirituality

10/26/13
Finding My Identity In Christ

My Identity In Christ

On Sunday, Oct 13, 2013, I was listening to the NPR program Ted Radio Hour. The topic was Identities. There were excerpts from 4 Ted Talks. The link for this program is: http://www.npr.org/2013/10/06/229879937/identities.

There are several themes that caught my attention: At the end of my essay, I have highlighted the most pertinent sentences for me from each speaker in this program, and, I have included surrounding material to help give my highlights context. Please goe to the page: Spirituality to read the entire article.

Like, man, Sarah of the Moon captures an era

My Central Tucson Book Club has Sarah of the Moon for this month's selection. Even though I will not be there to share with them, I decided to read it, in order to be with them in spirit. I had no idea what it was about or what I was getting into.

It is an excellent, well written book. I had never heard of Randy Mixter before, but I genuinely wonder why because his writing is exceptionally gifted. Within a very few pages, I was completely pulled into the story, to the degree that I did not feel I was reading but was watching a movie.

This is the story of Alex, a young man doing a summer internship for a Baltimore newspaper. The time is 1967 (I was 17 years old, between my high school junior and senior years). The major setting is the Haight-Ashbury area in San Francisco. Alex comes to SF to write weekly stories for his Baltimore paper, trying to give the "straight" adult (whole different meaning back then!) a picture of the Summer of Love and the counterculture scene. This is the setting.

The story is about Alex's coming of age, learning to accept people who are very different from him, to understand how this culture grew, and to find his own place in the world. Alex moves in to a house that his editor pays the rent on for his nephew. The scene of his entry into the house is quite funny, picturing out totally out of place Alex is. As Alex gets to know the houseguests (as they are called), we get to know them as individuals. At first, they are painted by a broad brush of "hippies". But over time we realize they each have their own story and are not so very different than "straight" young people.
I give this book 5 Stars! It is literature, well-written, interesting and an historic record of a life-changing era in the history of this country.

Sometimes the Truth Hurts

I follow 149 series, plus enjoy many stand alone novels and read and review books about to be published. I say this to explain why some of my reviews are years past publications dates.

The Brutal Telling: A Chief Inspector Gamache Novel by Louise Penny is a case in point. This is #5 in the series, published in 2009.

I love this series. Chief Inspector Gamache heads a detective team from the Sûreté du Québec. He has investigated several murders in and around the village of Three Pines, south of Quebec. During these investigations we have met the inhabitants, gotten to know their hopes and dreams, and their flaws and heartbreaks. They are an eclectic groups, arriving in Three Pines through many paths.

The Brutal Telling begins with a body being found in the local bistro. No one seems to know him. As the Sûreté du Québec team investigates, a feud comes to light between Olivier, the owner of the bistro and a B & B, and, the owner of a new spa in the area. The reader is privy to information about a friendship between Olivier and a recluse living deep in the woods. As Gamache digs deeper, he begins to wonder how Olivier has been able to afford his purchase and remodeling of the bistro and the B & B.

As some of the less appealing sides of some of the residents of Three Pines came to light, I had very mixed feelings. People I had grown to care about had darker behaviors than I wanted to face. I was compelled to keep reading because I had to know how it all turned out, but I was disquieted at the same time. I have come to appreciate the more realistic portrayal of these people. Ms. Penny makes the village seem more real and less of the fairy tale the first four books seemed to show.

I do recommend that if you have not read any of this series that you start at the beginning: Still Life. 

I feel that Ms Penny is masterful in creating a place and situations and characters of which you want to be a part. This is a five star recommendation!

Fear of Aging

I had a very vivid dream last night, so vivid I wanted to call my friend and make sure she wasn't really angry with me. Let me explain:


Grandma Stengl 1955

In my dream one of my best friends had hired me to help her with a PR project for her business. We had discussed the possibility a few times, but I was now "officially" meeting with her to get started.
She mentioned an idea we had floated at an earlier discussion, and I could remember none of the details. I asked her to refresh my memory, and she was rather short with me, saying something to the effect that had our pervious meetings been a waste of time. I was taken aback since we usually got along very well. I chalked it up to her having a bad day. But as we proceeded, it became obvious we had gone into a lot of detail in our previous chats, and I remembered none of it. My friend ended up walking away in disgust.
And then I woke up.
After my first thought that I needed to call my friend for reassurance, I realized how foolish that was, and, began to think about what it meant to me. It was all very obvious. My friend represented my competent, professional self, and I represented my current fears. I have been having greater and greater memory problems. I can't think of common, everyday words several times a day. I have always been bad with names of people I only see occasionally, but now it is happening with people I know well but don't see very often.
I have a fairly deep fear of developing dementia. I can't imagine the hell it must be for a productive person to gradually forget how to do things and who people are. My biggest, deepest fear is that I would lose my relationship with God and not recognize His presence with me or experience His comfort any more. And I certainly do not want to lose touch with my family and friends. ANd I don't want to put them through the heart-wrenching experience of my body still being present but the person they know and love not being there anymore.
My current walking program is partly to help stave off dementia as long as possible. I know I have good genes. My grandmother was alert and mentally "present" until a few days before her death. Pretty much the same with my mother. My dad died very young (52), but his mother lived into her 90's and still recognized her children when she died. So Alzheimer's does not run in the family. But I also know that physical and mental activity help decrease the chances of developing dementia.
It is my spiritual fear that runs the deepest. I do not want to let fear run my life, so I keep asking God for faith to believe He will be with me no matter where my life turns. And I am comforted by that, because I know there has never been a moment in my life thus far where He has abandoned me; even in those times when I didn't "feel" His presence, I knew on a deeper level that He was there. I am going to trust that this will be true until I take my dying breath. And then, I will be with Him!

To Dream or Not to Dream

About a week ago, I woke up with a strong sense that my next life project was to open a bookstore here in the artsy community in southern Arizona where I live part-time (for now!). I have been praying for over a year for clarity about what I am to do with my life once we move here full-time. I went back to school at age 30, after my two children were born, and then I worked as a therapist/counselor/group home director for the next 28 years. Two years ago, I "retired". I was burned out physically and emotionally. (another long story for another day).

All that is to say that I was a bit dumbfounded when the idea of a bookstore came to mind. I love books. I read everyday as much as I possibly can. When I am near the end of a book, I lose sleep finishing it before I close my eyes. I become wrapped up in the lives of the characters, and I often become the protagonist in my mind.

My love of books came from my mother. She was an English teacher by training and vocation (in her later years), and our home was covered in books and magazines. There was a floor-to-ceiling corner bookcase in our dining room filled with books, and there was a half-size book case in the corner of our living room filled with paperback books, magazines and our beloved World Book Encyclopedia. 

When my husband and I had our first child, my mother always bought books for him. And as he grew older, she would read to him. She bought beautiful illustrated books on the animal and insect kingdoms, story books about whatever topic was occupying his attention at the time.

I began taking our son to the library from the time he was born. In those early years, I was the one checking out books, but as he grew older, he began to attend story hour and choose several books to take home. As soon as he was able to print his name, he was able to get his own library card. it was a celebrated day in our home.

In the early years of our marriage, Ted and I could not afford to but books, but as his status in the work place increased, I began to frequent used bookstores and library sales in order to buy books of my own. From the time I went back to school, Ted and I have each had our own study in our home. Mine began to fill with bookcases and books. Ted had 1 bookcase for every three of mine.

As the kids grew older, Ted and I began to travel more, buying a time-share vacation home, and escaping to the sunshine and warmth of Mexico each year. We would take 1/2 a suitcase filled with books for our vacation reading. It became really problematic when we traveled to Europe and our suitcase weight was always too high. I was ecstatic when e-readers became available. For the last 8 years, we traveled with so much less luggage!

So the idea of a bookstore has deep roots in my psyche', but I have never actually considered it before. It seems a strange answer to my prayers about how I can minister and best serve the Lord at this time in my life.

But when I think of a bookstore, I think of cozy reading corners, a group room where book clubs can meet, a literary community center. I can also bring in books to sell that encourage people to think about their purpose in life, how to take better care of themselves, physically, spiritually and emotionally. I can have books that are FUN in order to bring more laughter into the world, and, of course, books for young readers and young adults that can fuel their desire to learn and grow!

So, I am beginning a journey to educate myself on what it would take to open and run a bookstore. I have no idea if this will actually happen, but I feel confident that for now, this is what I need to do. 

Joseph Campbell coined the phrase, "Follow your bliss", and lately I have heard so many people say that you need to occupy your life with work that you love. I loved being a counselor. For the last year, i have tried to image what type of counseling setting I should pursue here in AZ. Nothing grabbed my attention. But the idea of this bookstore has ignited my heart and mind, filled me with energy and excitement for the first time in a long time. May-be as I educate myself on becoming a bookstore owner, God will take me off in a tangential direction. I am open to being led and educated by the One who controls the universe.

Health Journey Part II

With my Grandson - Jan 2013

It is now two months after starting my journey to better health. 

I joined the Susan G Koman 3-Day for the Cure in order to give myself a concrete goal for walking. I was only able to 0.25 miles at a time back in Jan. Yesterday, I walked 3 miles. I admit that I had a break in the middle for lunch, but still, 3 miles!

Also, I have lost 19 pounds! WooHoo! I am using meals and supplements that keep my blood sugar even, and help me to build muscle and my metabolism while losing fat. It is a win-win, because as my muscle builds so does my metabolism, which helps burn more fat. I have to be faithful to exercise and eating healthy, but I receive concrete rewards for my efforts.

I have to admit that with all my previous attempts and failures, i was actually beginning to think that as an older person, I just couldn't be successful. But I am here to say, age does not matter!

One Billion Rising

Recently, a friend posted on FaceBook about an event planned for Feb 14: A Billion Women Rising event. It is in support of women around the world to help end abuse and exploitation against women. The article by Joan Chittister that talks about this event is: One Billion Women Rising

I hope you will read the article, and consider getting involved. With all the negative actions in this country toward women, especially during this past election, it is important that people stand up and say that respecting women is a priority!

Look at the movement site and decide what you can do to support bringing justice and respect to women everywhere: One Billion Rising

I haven't danced in years, but I am going to get down and dance on Feb 14. I will be attending the Tucson, AZ events all day long. I invite all of you, women who want to speak out, and, men who want to support them, to find an event near you and join. You can also plan an event if there isn't one near you. 
I hope you will become involved. 

Many years ago, I participated in a "Take Back the Night" event in Philadelphia. It was a movement to speak out against the attacks on women who were just trying to go about their life. Attacks and rapes were happening at an alarming rate: on the subway, in downtown, along neighborhood streets. It was so empowering for 10, 000 women to go down into the subway system in Center City Philly, walk the corridors and platforms. No one dared to bother all of us. There was incredible strength in numbers. Out of that movement, subway platforms were upgraded with better lighting, increased transit police presence, and emergency phones were installed. 
Take Back the Night History

In an atmosphere in our country where it feels as if some people are trying to erase women's rights, it is important to stand up and be counted. Don't just "Like"! Get involved. And blessings to each of you who do.

Before I Was Formed, God Knew

Today's meditation in Disciplines is JEREMIAH 1:4-10, where God tells Jerimiah, 

“Before I shaped you in the womb,
    I knew all about you.
Before you saw the light of day,
    I had holy plans for you:
A prophet to the nations—    that’s what I had in mind for you.” 

This scripture brought back strong memories I have of God being present with me when I was a very small child, some of which I was still in my crib. I have since come to realize that few people have these types of memories, at least in our culture. Historically Gaelic cultures acknowledge these types of "God awareness" memories in small child, and the "thin places" between this world and seeing God face to face. 

I certainly went through some periods of anger with God (when my father died), and some periods of questioning God's existence (especially during pretty severe postpartum depression after my second child was born). But for the most part, I sought God's Presence throughout my life.

I have always found it comforting when I come across scriptures that remind me that God has known me even before I was born. I am comforted my hearing that God has given me gifts and ministries before I was even born. My frustration has been that God doesn't always easily reveal WHAT I am being called to do and WHERE I am supposed to do it.

Two years ago i retired from my work here in PA, in preparation for moving to AZ, and, because I was burning out physically and emotionally at my job. After two years of preparing our PA home for sale, and setting up our AZ home, I feel more ready to become involved in ministry again. I don't know if God will give me a new job, or have me do volunteer work, but I want to get more involved again. ANd I feel this desire is being stirred in my heart by God.

I do not know what my future holds, but I know that I am in God's hands. I am in a waiting and watching stance, one of my least favorite. I want to "know" what my future holds. But in not knowing the details, I am forced to watch intently for God's movement in my life. I am open and looking. I am paying attention to ways God is piercing through the thin places in my life. And I am grateful that I do not have to figure these things out by myself.

Working Together

I have watched at least part of each inauguration since President Kennedy was sworn in to office. For me, it is a day for putting aside party politics and for celebrating the amazing gift of peaceful transitions from one president to the next. Our founding fathers developed an amazing process to ensure our future without need for revolution or violence.

I respect the office of president, and even when Presidents such as Bush, Reagan and even Nixon, were sworn in, I celebrated the peaceful transfer of power and the office of the President.

I wasn't able to watch the inauguration today, but I will listen to Pres. Obama's speech on line later this evening. I think it is very special that this inauguration is celebrated on Martin Luther King, Jr Day. It somehow highlights how profound it is that Pres Obama was reelected. Though we have far to go in equality for all, we have come so far since those turbulent days in the 1960's when Dr. King was campaigning for civil rights.


  I am proud and grateful to be an American. My heart fills with thankfulness for this experiment in democracy that grows and evolves over the years, but continues to move forward in allowing each voice to be heard, each dream to be worked toward, and each need to be addressed.